The Daily Bull

by **Kasrkin Seath** on Thu Sep 23, 2010 9:26 pm

just because...

Part One

Once upon a time a dog pooped on a dime. And Pikachu made cherry pie. But that's not the point of this story. No, this is a story of a coming of age. They got this sayin' where I'm from: "Whitewater in the morning." It was one of those mornings, and as we all know Bobby Mals is the hottest guy on campus, but I can't compete with him. It's not like either of us to have big black dicks. Our comparison was not unlike that of dark beer vs. light beer. I woke up in the morning and decided to fuck Cindy Crysby today. That would be my goal.

One might say Shenanigans to that notion, and indeed just then, the red-headed ballerina yelled "Shenanigans!" and pirouetted out of the door, leaving me utterly confused. But if I've learned anything at MTU, it's that the penis mightier.

I walked out my door, just in time for a child to yell "Who stole the chicked?" from across the street. Thinking nothing of it, I began to ask myself "Are you for panda rape? Fuck a fruit basket." An odd question indeed, old boy. But, the obtuse hippo was juxtaposed against the dark background of my tears. Which is sort of a metaphor for bluffin' with my muffin. If you don't know what that means, well, then you're as 'into it' as a jar of dirt.

This question brought me to my next question: what if Santa's reindeer shit on the Easter Bunny's fucking eggs? What would happen then? That's when Steve caught up to me.

"So what are your thoughts about anal?"

"That's what she said last night!"(Referencing the red-headed ballerina) And naturally I responded "Boomshckalacka!"

"Well, you cant kill evil with a spoon," I said "Steve... my meat is real. I am not an ordinary man."

"What's that supposed to even mean?"

"Im not sure either..."

End of Part One

EDIT: btw, if you are wonding, the school paper went around asking people to write down a random sentence a couple weeks ago. This story is just those sentences combined.