Warriors of Light

character list

Grand Army of the Republic

3rd System Army

212th Attack Battalion

Clone Marshal Commander CC-2224 “Cody”
Private CT-8912 “Twelve”
Sergeant CT-9309 “Niner”

501st Legion

Clone Commander CC-1119 “Appo”
Capitan CC-7567 “Rex”

Republic 7th Fleet

Capitan CT-8901 “Basilisk”
Lieutenant CT-0177 “Sev”
Lieutenant CT-4910 “Rogue”

Republic commandos

RC-1902 “Delta”
RC-1892 “Fi”
RC-2007 “Sev”
RC-0092 “Striker”

UNSC Personnel

SPARTAN Will-009 (Male Human)
Corporal Henry Anderson (Male Human)
UNSC AI 09234/1 “Hammer” (Female Ship AI)


Other personnel

Jason “Deadeye” Dawning’s, Pilot of YT-1300 Freighter “Remembrance of Dusk” (Male Human)
Sergeant Onyx Bar-Nok, Mandalorian Mercenary (Male Human)
General Ahsoka Tano, Jedi Knight (Female Togruta)

Well.....................good luck with that.

>.> hmm i hope it goes well ^.^

.... yea... i pray for you.....

i can tell this wount end well

Prologue

UNSC Frigate Hornet
13:56 Hours [Ship Time] //Location Unknown//

“Capitan’s getting jumpy from that ship. Look at the console, Mac.” Mac was confused but still looked at the console, Capitan Simons wanted the SPARTAN they picked up on there rescue run thawed and at the bridge fast. “I think we should double the wake up stim on him, I have the feeling that this won’t end well,” said Mac. The other crewman with him in the cryo tube was a UNSC marine named Anderson who was a corpsman and looked like he had an idea what he was doing. “Well,” said Anderson, “I have that feeling too, old friend.” It has been a long time since med school hasn’t it? thought Mac. A few moments of nothing but silence and the only thing that could be heard was the sound of computer keys until Anderson said “He’s hot. Blowing the pins in five, better get down there Mac I need to get to the bridge for my mission in this mess and good luck.” Luck, Mac thought, we will all need luck to get out of this.


RAS Hammer of Dawn
07:00 Hours [System Time] 365 Days After Clone Wars
Near Hoth Asteroid Field

“Unknown ship is now barring point two-zero and is holding steady,” said the voice of another clone soldier on the bridge of the Hammer of Dawn. “This may be why the general has been acting strange. Radio if you need back up, and only if you do; is that clear soldier?” said the disembodied voice of another clone that was on Hoth doing the main engagement. I hate picket duty, thought Sev, nothing ever happens. “Hay ner vod” said a new clone officer, Don.
“What you want, Don? I’m busy, we have a Unknown warship here.”
“Sorry Lieutenant, but some of us want to know what the ship is.”
“There’s a reason why they’re called Unknowns.”
Noobs. I really hate them. This guy has to have been sent from the meat cans to fill up our ranks on this tin can.
“Sorry, Sev im still new to this.”
“We all were once, Don’ika.”
“Too right mate.”
After a few moments Don walked away to talk with his weapon station. Really need to stop getting white jobs as officers in the navy, thought Sev, Even if Kamino isn’t making clones any more. “Wait,” said Sev “the unknown is changing position and I’m getting an increase with the same power signature of magnetic coils.”
“Fierfek, sound general quarters, man all guns, get damage control ready, bring deflector shields to maximum,” said Captain Cutter “We’re in for one hell of a ride this time.”

Verry good V! I suggest that, like the others, it's a little less straight forward and goes a bit more in dept with the characters. Add a bit more detail into their physical and psychological traits, possibly a little to their past as well. Overall, you've got me hooked. I give it a 6/10 (a good score from me).

its pretty good

Chapter 1: A Heroes Rise

UNSC Frigate Hornet
14:15 Hours [Ship Time] //Location Unknown//

“All hands to your action stations,” said the disembodied voice of the ships AI as Henry ran to the bridge. Looks like we are turning to engage that ship, thought Henry, better hurry, we don’t even know what were fighting. As Henry ran down the hall way he saw marines prepping machine guns in the hallways to stop whatever was coming.
“Corporal, Capitan’s waiting on the bridge; lets move. Anderson” said a marine sergeant. Never met him before but this ship is small as hell. I’m only a few meters from the bridge. Henry entered the elevator to the bridge but he knew one thing about this mission: he was going to be working with SPARTAN-009 and most likely trying to get off this ship. As he walked onto the bridge Captain Simons was telling the other two men, Vats and McKnight, what to do; from what Henry herd as he got on, it sounded like they were going to try something but not much. After a few moments the Spartan came up to the bridge to and the briefing began.
“Spartan and Corporal Anderson, you can guess why you’re here.” There was a moment of silence, and then the Spartan said what he thought.
“Captain, I’m guessing we are fallowing Cole Periodical, Sir.”
“That’s right Spartan, you have to get Hammer off this ship.”
“With all do respect,” Henry cut in, “there is no planet to land on. We will just be sitting ducks in a life pod.”
“You are wrong Corporal, there is a planet; we are firing the Shiva nuke at that ship fallowed by the last MAC round, there is a ice planet behind it. We scanned, there are ships near by but they’re on the far side so you will be fine.”
After that a woman’s voice said “I’m ready Capitan the nuke is loaded and the MAC is charge in your crew should be able to handle it from here”
“Thank you Hammer.”
“And I may say Capitan, you and your crew are some of the best men I have served with.”
“It’s been a pleasure, ma’am.”
With that, Captain Simons pulled a chip out of a panel and told Will, “Good luck… to both of you.”
Will put the chip into his head and Henry said, “And good luck to you too, Sir.”
“I’ll give the signal to launch you life pod after the nuke has been launched.” Henry nodded his head and he and Will when down to the life pod, they never saw the Capitan again.

Seems good, but why are they attacking the ship if they don't know what it is?

And before you go any further, please remember that Star Wars shields only protect against energy weapons.
So projectiles will pass right through them.

PiElord wrote:Seems good, but why are they attacking the ship if they don't know what it is?

And before you go any further, please remember that Star Wars shields only protect against energy weapons.
So projectiles will pass right through them.

fail pie SW shealds protect from metal slugs and rock and space junk but not big ones

Darman wrote:

PiElord wrote:Seems good, but why are they attacking the ship if they don't know what it is?

And before you go any further, please remember that Star Wars shields only protect against energy weapons.
So projectiles will pass right through them.

fail pie SW shields protect from metal slugs and rock and space junk but not big ones

No they don't.

In Episode V, the imperial ships were bombarded with asteroids, and had taken heavy damage to their hulls.

i said exept big ones pie

Chapter 2: Strike

RAS Hammer of Dawn
07:35 Hours [System Time] 365 Days ACW
Near Hoth Asteroid Field

“Sir, Unknown warship is preparing something but I can’t tell what, magnetic coil energy signature is still showing,” said Sev, looking at his control panel on the bridge of the Hammer of Dawn.
“Sir! The ship just launched a missile at us; time to impact: 23 seconds,” said another clone officer on the bridge. Everyone on the bridge looked surprised, only pirates engage a Republic war ship at that heading and range.
“Brace for impact,” said Captain Cutter and a few seconds later a big flash of light came from the starboard section of the ship, so bright that it had to have blinded most of the men without their helmets on.
“By the force, what was that!” said another clone after the light subsided.
“I need a damage assessment now,” said Captain Cutter. Sev ran to the bridge view port and looked out to see the hull was scorched where the weapon hit.
“Sir, look. What ever that was scorched the hull,” said Sev.
“Captain, all weapons systems, shields, and propulsion systems are down and we are drifting.”
“Fierfek it was some sort of new ion weapon.”
“I don’t think so, Sir.”
After a few moments there was a loud but fast screeching sound, like 2 ships smashing together and one officer near the forward view port said, “That ship just fired a giant metal slug that went clean through the ship, Sir.” Then the ship started to turn slightly and then a explosion, meaning the engine room was hit.
“Sir, I have made COM contact with Commander Cody.”
“Tell him we need back up.”
Another clone cut in, “Sir, I have an escape pod leaving their ship, but can’t get a heading.”
“Let it go, we can’t hit it.”
Over the COM Captain Cutter was talking with Commander Cody; other men were getting damage reports. We should be abandoning ship,thought Sev, scratching his black hair, but no one cares about us, we’re expendable. He walked up to the view port of the bridge and saw the big hole in the side that apparently gutted the ship center. Fierfek, thought Sev, they can do that with one shot. If there are more I don’t think we will make it. The question about what hit the ship bothered Sev and it takes a lot to do that from what he saw in the Clone Wars.

It's good.

I especially liked the different terminologly used by either side.
(i.e, Life Boat, and Escape Pod)